Being Held

Hello Sweet Friends!  It's been several weeks since my last post.  Life has certainly changed for us.  Trying to overcome all the challenges that we have faced since our miscarriage has been really hard.  For me personally, I continue to struggle every day with the loss of our precious miracles.  I do my very best to stay strong and stay centered in God's Word, but the grief hits me on a daily basis.  Some days are better than others.  I never forget them.  Not for one second.  I grieve their loss and I mourn the future we had planned for them.  It hurts my heart every time I walk into our back bedroom we had planned for their nursery. 

I try to hide my broken heart from everyone because I don't want to seem weak and weepy all the time.  I don't always succeed and that is when God reminds me of His scripture:

But He said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness."  Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weakness, so that Christ's power may rest on me."  2 Corinthians 12:9

I'm realizing it's okay to tell people that I'm hurting.  It's okay to cry.  It's okay to mourn our loss and our plans for their future.  It's okay to be weak.  It's during my weakness that God can really work.  This is what it means to held by my Abba Father. 

I don't know God's plan for us.  I don't know if our dream of having our own children will ever be our reality.  But I do know that whatever I face; whatever mountain gets in my way; whatever heartbreak hits me; that God is holding me and loving through every moment.  <3